Tuesday, September 13, 2016

Oh Shane, Will You Ever Learn?

I'm not sure how I've missed it for two years, but there is a deliriously funny series of pictures of notes to a Walmart employee by the management.  One of the best:
The complete list from the original poster:
  • Shane, quit offering extended warranties on the fried chickens -Management
  • Shane, stop asking, "Is that your final answer?" and offering to let them phone a friend after each order -Management
  • Shane, when a customer asks where to find a product, give them an aisle number, not directions to Albertsons -Management
  • Shane, quit putting price tags on deli equipment and trying to sell them to customers -Management
  • Shane, stop implying that Walmart keeps the "good stuff" in the back -Management
  • Shane, I don't know what "Swinecraft" is, but ham can not be sold as a building material  -Management
  • Shane, quit putting on multiple name tags and pretending to have a personality disorder  -Management
  • Shane, the deli is not an appropriate place to practice your ventriloquism, please stop making puppets out of the paper bags  -Management
  • Shane, stop putting "Stoner approved" seals on the fried chicken  -Management
  • Shane, stop putting out samples labelled as "Mystery meats"  -Management
  • Shane, stop putting "Some assembly required" stickers on the 8-piece chickens  -Management
  • Shane, any free samples you offer must come from the deli, not electronics!  -Management
While the real-life Shanenigans stopped there, on the Internet they have taken on a life of their own, with an entire subreddit devoted to Shaneisms.

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